Bodybuilder Matt Kroc wrote:
“Thank you for understanding and being supportive, I really appreciate it. Being a total alpha male and transgender definitely makes me unique even in the transgender community. And of course also makes me incredibly complex as a person. I often feel like two completely different people trying to share one body with both fighting over who gets to be in control.
Because I worked so hard to condition myself to be who I wanted to be it’s difficult to say who I would have been had I been free to be myself from day one. I am naturally competitive and always loved sports but there’s no denying I’m transgender and that I was always drawn to femininity as well.
Gender identity and personality tests that I have taken in an effort to figure myself out always indicate that I am both hyper-masculine and hyper-feminine. Exactly what I need to do to be at peace with myself is something I am still not 100% certain of.
Transitioning is a very difficult process and even tougher at an older age (I’m 42). Your body doesn’t respond to hormones very well as compared to being in your teens or twenties and I have built a very good life for myself that I am hesitant to give up. And living as a transgender woman that is honest about her situation is very difficult and can be very dangerous. I am a very realistic person and I don’t think the transitioning will magically solve all of my issues without creating new challenges. Whatever path I choose there will be sacrifices to be made.”